@Chuck Yeah, I probably shouldn't feel so bad about things like that. I would say it's a personal failing of mine that I do. I mean, sometimes I do over the most ridiculous things. For something like learning someone is gay, I'd go back in my head and try and think of every single thing I've told them and if I might have made them feel bad and so on. Ultimately, it's my problem of course.
I mean, just now, I was reading that two people didn't like Dan Savage (Rain and you) and I went all "Oh no! I like him!". But then I have to correct myself and go "so what? I'm allowed to". It's not like we're going to kill each other over that, we've disagreed before.

It's comfortable to feel reinforced by meeting people who are the same way as you are, or who fit the expectations you had of them, but ultimately you grow more from meeting people who break the mould. And if you learn your assumptions were incorrect, you need to tell yourself "oh, okay" and not "oh my god I've been an asshole all that time!"

Nobody can be expected to know the right answer to any question they're asked, the right way to act in any circumstance, and everything about everyone they interact with. So yeah, I just need to let it go.

(And I still like Dan Savage, so there).