I hope you do, Chuck, I hope you do. I also had hope up until maybe ten days before the election when someone I love said "Well, it won't affect us if he wins," and that was when I realized he would win. Not because that person, whom I love and respect, would actually vote for the guy, but that the strain of "not my problem" runs so deeply in the American psyche that it even touches on the people I love and respect.

I am bereft.

The day of the election was also the day I lost my neighbor to leukemia -- he was about a decade older than you and I, and I've lived next to him for nearly 20 years. I watched his kids grow up. I didn't know his political affiliation; I didn't even know his religious beliefs or whether he had them (turns out he did). That gives me a sort of hope. He was kind and generous to me always, and I hope he felt I was with him as well.

I guess I mention that to support local connection and staying away from social media. I gave up my social media when that jerk bought Twitter and haven't missed it -- though I know what you mean about it being harmful to the brain. I think that feeling will pass in time, especially if you put that time meaningfully elsewhere.

In the last year I've been focusing on learning to draw, a skill I've always wanted to learn. I'm getting better, though I'm still a ways off from good. I've recently joined the art association in my county, and am hoping to spend time at events (it's a little slower as it gets colder) just doing plein air sketches or figure drawing or whatever. I've been taking a class, and though it's only a few months, those evenings are a highlight each week, and having a focus for what drawing work I'll do between classes has been a real blessing. It's a supportive atmosphere and even though I suspect it leans quite liberal (as Maryland does), it's not a topic that often comes up and it's not what I'm there for.

I'm deeply hurt, and honestly despairing, right now. I'm disappointed that voter turnout in this country is between 50 and 70%. I'm saddened at the thought that so many people discarded what is best in us in favor of what is worst in us. I'm terrified of what the future will bring on so many fronts. I'm thinking a lot about Orwell. But at the same time, I'm trying to find places to find hope and repair, as it seems you are trying to do. I think they are out there.

Good luck, friend.